In Focus Photography By: Nicole: Blog http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog en-us (C) In Focus Photography By: Nicole nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) Mon, 18 Dec 2017 14:40:00 GMT Mon, 18 Dec 2017 14:40:00 GMT http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/img/s/v-5/u804502880-o325320277-50.jpg In Focus Photography By: Nicole: Blog http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog 120 80 New Series http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/12/new-series Pain.....Brain Fog.....Anxiety.....

These are the first 3 images of my Fibromyalgia series!! There will be 10 images total, which I can't wait to work on!!

If you have chronic pain, most of these will be familiar to you, unfortunately, a lot of people don't believe that people with chronic pain are actually in pain, because they can't see it with their eyes. They say it must be all in your head, or it's not real. I am creating this series to show you just how real it is! 

I started getting symptoms 6.5 years ago after my Mom passed away. I have been diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder right afterwards, and that in turn brought on my fibro. For 3.5 years I had no clue what was wrong with me, why somedays I would be in extreme pain and some days not so much, 3 years ago I was finally diagnosed with Fibro, which was a relief in one way because I knew what was going on, and then, on the other hand, I was thinking, crap I am stuck with this now.

This series isn't pretty, it's blunt and in your face, that is the way I wanted to create it but also how it had to be created in order for people to "see" what we feel every day of our lives!!

Pain
The skin pain is one of the worst when you shower it feels like nails are coming out instead of water. When you use a puff to wash yourself it feels like a cheese grater, when you put on clothes or if anything brushes against your skin it hurts, it can feel like the worst sunburn you have ever had. When someone tries to comfort you, you can't let them because their touch hurts. When I have a flare this is the first thing I notice, when my skin starts to hurt I know it's just going to get worse.

Brain Fog
It's more than just being forgetful, although that is a huge thing for us. I forget to eat and drink water, I have over 11 alarms on my phone to remind me to take my medications, to do laundry, to do dishes, everything is set by an alarm. I have short-term memory loss, which is frustrating for myself and everyone in my life. You get confused and disoriented, it's a battle every day and for me, this is one that never leaves. 

Anxiety
I have had anxiety and panic attack disorder since I was a teenager, as I have gotten older it has gotten worse, I have to take medication for it, or I wouldn't be here, to be honest. The anxiety and panic hit it's peak when I got Fibro, with everything that goes on with your body and mind, you panic, the pain is unbearable some days and you just can't stop thinking about it. My mind never stops, it never has. And when your mind doesn't stop, it can go into scary places, and make you freak out about things you normally wouldn't. I have slowly taught myself how to get through an attack and if I can't, I have some amazing friends that will talk me through it. 

There will be more in this series to come, my goal is to have this series put into a gallery, sounds strange maybe but I feel that this needs to be out there and talked about!! 

I would love your thoughts on it so far!! 

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this, and stay tuned to my page for more work!

Nikki xoxoxox

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) anxiety art brain by conceptual dark emotion fine focus fog in light nicole pain photography portraits running self series surreal woman http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/12/new-series Mon, 18 Dec 2017 14:40:02 GMT
Spiritual Rebirth http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/10/spiritual-rebirth  

Spiritual Rebirth!

In 2015 I created an image called “Bluebird” and this is what I wrote with that image:


“Bluebird.....I started this amazing journey full-time in November, taking a leap of faith and start creating the art that I love. I feel like a baby bird sometimes, newly hatched and growing little by little so one day I can spread my wings and fly. I found this abandoned nest and knew I had to use it for this image”

Yesterday I created my newest piece Spiritual Rebirth, which is all about finding my true self!! Finding my confidence, that belief in myself that I have never really had, figuring out what I am meant to be doing and fully committing to doing that, finding my spiritual self again, following my intuition which has brought me to this point!

I took time off to concentrate on myself, and honestly, everyone should do that once in a while, it’s life changing! I took a course called Kick Start Your Confidence, which changed my life, I am still doing tapping and listening to my script every day to grow even farther! 

I took an intuition class, which in turn answered a lot of questions I have had since I was a very little girl, and has unlocked a whole new part of my life, and if you would like to follow me on that journey, feel free to join my new group: Spiritual Journey

I knew already that my art is something that I am meant to do, but I know even more now. Concentrating on my art and no longer offering family sessions etc. wasn’t an easy decision but it definitely was, the right one for me. With doing that, I now will be offering workshops to mom, dads, children that would like to know how to work their DSLR camera’s, so that in between those family sessions they can capture their families doing what they do. 
Now to this image…. I was meditating on Saturday, I went to a place in my mind that is peaceful and makes me happy, when I was there I saw bluebirds, and I couldn’t get it out of my head. I don’t know the whole meaning behind it yet, but I do know that bluebirds mean happiness and growth, and boy does that resonate with me and my journey so far. 

I knew that I needed to create an image of me with bluebird wings, and it came exactly how I pictured it, this one will be going into my gallery in my studio!!

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this, if you would like to follow my spiritual journey make sure to join my group, we are going to have a lot of fun in there!

As always your support means the world to me!!

Nikki xoxoxo

 

Blue Bird

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/10/spiritual-rebirth Mon, 16 Oct 2017 13:26:06 GMT
One Light http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/7/one-light One Light

I have always been profoundly affected by music, it inspires me to create when I am editing I always listen to music, usually something with dark lyrics, that goes with what I am trying to create, it feeds my soul to keep working until I am done.

Music has made me laugh, cry, smiling, 
sing at the top of my lungs and made me dance like no one is watching!

Growing up Linkin Park was a big part of my life, it has been since they started! This newest album really spoke to me, because it describes how I have felt for the past 6 plus years, what it’s like to be inside my head. When I heard that Chester had committed suicide I was devasted, just like Chris Cornell, the world lost an amazing person and singer.

The song One More Light by Linkin Park inspired this image, if you haven’t heard it I definitely suggest you listen to it, it’s powerful, sad but so beautiful! I have lost so many loved ones not just in the past 6 years but my whole life, I have experienced a lot of loss. As a lot of you know by now, there have been times when I was in a really bad place, a place where I at times didn’t want to come out of, I just wanted it all to end, but I did come out of it! It was incredibly hard but I did it, and I know that through out my life I will fall back into that dark place again, but I know that I am capable of crawling out!! This song speaks to me like no other!!

I started with an image of a tree in my backyard that I took about 3 months ago, originally there was just going to be lanterns hanging in it, all brightly lit, I wasn’t going to be in it at all. But as I was listening to the song, I knew how that image was supposed to turn out.
I added 7 lanterns, simply because 7 is my lucky number. I knew one of them would be brightly lit, and the others dimly lit.

I created this on July 21st on my 38th Birthday and it was the BEST way to spend my day, creating something that means so much to me!!

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this

Nikki xoxoxo
 

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/7/one-light Sun, 23 Jul 2017 15:03:55 GMT
Freedom http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/7/freedom Freedom

If you read my last blog you know that I have made some changes that will take effect starting in 2018, if you been following me for any amount of time you will also know that I have gone back and forth with this decision and have changed my mind a lot, lol.  This time is definitely, different, I know that this is the time to do it, so much has happened in the past year that opened my eyes and pretty much made the choice for me.  If you haven’t read the blog you can do so here:
http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/7/2018-changes

Now on to this image, I took the elements for this piece about a month ago, maybe more. I finally sat down to create it yesterday, which felt amazing. This piece is #5 in my Light Series that I am creating.

For me this piece is about my future, not looking back or in the past, just seeing how big, open, and bright it is. Now, this isn’t about just about the fact that I am going to be creating my art full time plus the children’s sessions, but I also signed up as a distributor for It Works! I have been searching for so long for health products ( their lifestyle products are amazing ) that I am not allergic too, don’t have a bad reaction too and that is natural, so when I finally tried their greens etc I fell in love ( if you haven’t heard of it, shoot me a message ) ANYWAY, I am super excited about these two things, and I just have this feeling both will not only help me in different ways, but that this is the direction I should be going and it’s going to be BIG!!

When I took these images, I really didn’t know what this one would be about, what feeling it would give, but just from the way I am feeling, I knew as soon as I started to edit, it was going to be about my future, my families future, openness, following my heart and dreams, and freedom!

I have 5 more images to go to finish this series, but I still need to brainstorm those ones!!

Thanks so much for checking this blog out, if you haven’t heard of the changes please read the blog above ( click link at beginning of this post )


Also, don’t hesitate to reach out to me if you have any questions

You are all amazing and I hope you have an amazing day!

Nikki xoxoxo

 

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/7/freedom Thu, 20 Jul 2017 16:14:07 GMT
2018 Changes http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/7/2018-changes Hey, everyone!!!

I was going to do this as a post but thought a blog would be easier since I always have lots to say, lol.
If you haven't seen, I have Christmas Mini's posted there are only 2 left! Nov 5th at 1 pm and 2 pm!! Check out my facebook page for all the details on the event!!

Now on to the 2018 announcements!!!
The end of 2016 and all of 2017 so far has been a pretty big eye opener for me, in my personal life as well as in my business. With my youngest being a sick as he was and the ongoing struggles we will have with him, has been the biggest eye opener, it made me realize that things need to change and so that is happening!

Starting in 2018 I will not be booking sessions beside Children's Fine Art and Fine Art ones, my reason for that, that is where my heart is and my gut is telling me to follow my heart so I am. Having said that through out next year I will be posting mini sessions that will be available at different locations, like Kincardine Beach, Hanover conservation area, Sauble beach, the beautiful place with the willow tree by my house etc. There will only be a few available and I will make an event for these sessions, make sure you like and follow my business page so you get updates! I don't know how many I plan to do through out the year, it really depends on my schedule.

I will still be doing the I love you sessions because those are incredibly important to me! You can read more about that on my website.

I have loved photographing everyone's families for 9 years, but after this year I just knew it was time to follow my dreams as well as make some tough choices that are best for my family! 
Please make sure you keep your eyes open for those mini session that will pop up if you are wanting a family session by me next year. If you are wanting a children's fine art or fine art session, don't hesitate to book one! And if you know a family that is dealing with a terminal illness that you think would like to have an I love you session, give them my information and tell them to contact me.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this as well as for all your continued support, it means the world to me! 
If you have any questions at all please don't hesitate to ask me 

Nikki xoxoxo

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/7/2018-changes Fri, 14 Jul 2017 16:36:18 GMT
Walk Away http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/6/walk-away Walk Away

This was taken when I was photographing elements for my “Veiled” image, as I was getting into position. Tuesday night when I was trying to fall asleep it kept popping up in my head and I knew it was the 4th piece for my Light Series.

Walk Away sounds so simple, doesn’t it?! But it really isn’t. Throughout my life, I have had people that I thought were my friends and even family stab me in the back or show their true colours. I know I am not the only one that has been through this, unfortunately, most of us have at one point or another.

When you find out the truth about someone, it hurts really, bad.  I found myself in denial a lot of the times that someone that cared about me, could do that, but it happens. I tried in one case for about 4.5 years to “fix” things, apologize for something I didn’t even do, and then one day it all changed. After receiving something, that was just a slap in the face, I knew it was time to just walk away from it, as hard as it might be it was the best thing for me to do.

You really need to do what is best for you in these situations, and it took me almost my whole life to figure out that sometimes it’s just better to Walk Away

Nikki xoxo xoxo

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/6/walk-away Fri, 09 Jun 2017 11:02:38 GMT
Veiled http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/6/veiled June 5th has come and gone for another year. As always, I was bracing myself for a long day of crying and not eating, but to my surprise, the day was better than I could have ever thought. I actually smiled and laughed, cooked dinner like I normally do, not just grabbing a frozen pizza because I was too sad to do anything else. I felt guilty at first, because well I was so used to be so upset on my Mom’s anniversary, but then I felt happy because I know in my heart that is what my Mom would want, she just wants me to smile, laugh and have joy in my life again.

On Saturday, I thought of this image, and in my mind, it was much darker in both the look of it and the emotion of it, but when I sat down to work on it yesterday I had this feeling come over me that the sky needed to be lighting and warmer, so that is what I did.

For me I feel like I am constantly surrounded or veiled in darkness, losing a loved one will do that to you, so will depression and anxiety, that was my thought behind this piece. The dress and veil moving around me are my darkness, but all around me is light and beauty, and it’s starting to grow larger and brighter and it’s starting to cover my darkness. This image is all about internal and external light, I feel like my light within is dimmed, but it wants to shine brightly again, just like the sunset that is surrounding me in this image.

This is the 3rd image in a series of 10 that I am creating, which is all about light. This is a series that I feel I need to do, I don’t know why but I just know it needs to be done, maybe it’s just another part of my healing process.

I do know one thing, my art brings me joy, it makes the light in me shine brighter, I know in my heart and head that it’s what I am meant to do.

I hate that I discovered my art the way I did, losing my Mom, and I would give it up in a heartbeat if it meant I could have her back, but that is not possible, so I am grateful that I have it to help me in my journey here without her. Each image has a small piece of her in it, she is my inspiration behind ever image that I create and that makes it even more special to me.

Nikki xoxoxo

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/6/veiled Wed, 07 Jun 2017 11:03:20 GMT
Exposed http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/6/exposed
This was a tough image to create, holding the position with my head under the water was hard, editing was hard, but also the emotion behind this has been the hardest. 

June 5th is coming up, it’s Monday….it is the day that my Mom passed away. 6 years ago, she left us and my life was forever changed, I am a completely different person then I was when she was here, and I have come to accept that and I am learning to love this new me too. 
Starting in April things start to get very difficult for me, I remember every moment and struggle she went through, as June approaches that just get worse, and my depression goes into full swing. For anyone that has struggled with depression you will know what I am talking about, you have your great days or even weeks and then BAM one day you are in a very dark place and you are trying to claw your way out of it. 


When I get into this place and I remember those last moments with my Mom, I feel like I am drowning, it’s hard to breathe or catch my breath, my heart aches…..it literally feels like it’s breaking, it hurts so bad which just makes the breathing harder to do. That is what this image is about…
I am exposing every single bit of me here, my skin yes but my emotion too, this is how it feels in those moments like you are underwater and you can’t get out, you try but you can’t!


There are no words to describe how the loss of my Mom affected me, how it changed me so I do it through my work. When I create my art, there are a lot of dark images, and you may wonder why….well, it’s just who I am, this is how I get out of my dark hole, I create what I am feeling and it’s like a release. I create beautiful images to the eye like “A Storm is Coming “but to me images like “Exposed”, “Cracked” and “Tangled” are equally as beautiful, they are darker, yes, but none the less they are beautiful because they are still a part of me, they are still my heart and soul. 

There will be a whole series in my tub, so you can look forward to that in the near future!

Thank you so much,

Nikki xoxoxo

 

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/6/exposed Sat, 03 Jun 2017 14:19:40 GMT
A Storm is Coming http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/5/a-storm-is-coming On Saturday, we were going around to garage sales, I love going to those because you just never know what you are going to find, well this time it was a bust so we decided to go to the salvation army, see if there was anything there, I walked in and saw a huge amount of dresses, I am not kidding my heart beats faster when I see dresses, especially wedding dresses, lol.


I saw this one, and instantly fell in love with it, it had a full skirt, lots of details and a very long train, it reminded me of my own wedding dress, so I looked at the size, and price and grabbed it!!

I had plans on creating, this image already, I just didn’t know what dress I was going to wear, but I knew this would be perfect!!

So that evening we packed into the car and drove to the road by our house. I set up my tripod and camera and instructed Rye when to push the shutter down, after all, I needed a car look out and that dress well made it difficult to run around. I had cars honking at me, waving thinking I had just gotten married, it was so much fun!!

Now to why the image is called “A Storm is Coming”

On June 5th it will be 6 years since my Mom passed away, just to say that it feels unreal to me that she has been gone that long, ever
since then I have faced so many difficult things, some I didn’t know if I was going to make it out of. This past year has been incredibly hard as well with our youngest being sick and not knowing what was going on with him, there have been MRI’s, tears, and lots of sleepless nights, it has taken a toll on all of us. Even though all these “storms” have come along, and I might have wavered and fallen, I have always gotten back up and stood as strong as I could, with the help of my friends and Ryan I have been able to get up.
 

That is what this image means for me, standing strong even though everything is coming at you wanting to knock you down!!

I feel like I am finally getting back to me again, back to what I love and it feels really good!
I will be working on a page on here of my art that will be for sale, available as prints and canvases, so make sure you look out for a blog about that!!

 

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this and for all of the support!!

Nikki xoxoxo

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/5/a-storm-is-coming Wed, 31 May 2017 11:31:36 GMT
Cracked http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/5/cracked Cracked
 

Since the end of last year, I have not wanted to create anything, I didn’t even want to pick up my camera, which anyone that knows me knows that is just not right, lol.
I didn’t know if it was the severe depression that was causing it, or all the things that have been happening in our lives for the past year, or both. I just felt lost and didn’t know what to do about it. In about April I knew I had to make some changes, it really, just kind of hit me to be honest. I knew that I needed to concentrate on my Art and Fine Art Portraits, but even with knowing that my heart wasn’t there yet.

Fast forward to May 17th and I woke up to the news that Chris Cornell had passed away, now I normally don’t get too emotional when someone passes away that I didn’t know, but I grew up listening to his music and just loved it, his music had a huge impact on my life!! I decided that day to listen to one of Audioslave’s albums, one song that is my favourite that I hadn’t heard in a while really stuck out to me, so I watched the video and that is what got me inspired, for me music and what has been happening in my life is what inspires me. The song is called “Like a Stone” listen to the song, read the lyrics and watch the video, it is an amazing song. The tones of my image and the abandoned room are my ideas I took from the video. It got up the next day and literally forced myself to go to the studio to take my self-portraits for it, I say forced because even though I had this image in my head I didn’t want to go out there and photograph anything but I knew I needed to create it. I did go out there and then I sat down for the next 7 ½ hours straight, I didn’t eat or drink anything, when I get in the zone I don’t focus on anything else, this is the image that came from that song/video that inspired me. Cracked.


You may be wondering why it is called Cracked or why did I create it, this past year has been incredibly hard for our family, besides Bryce’s health which has been stressful to say the least, there is so much more going on that I am not going to get into, although some of you already know. All of this caused me to slip into a deep depression, similar to what happened after my Mom passed away, and I didn’t know if I was going to be able to climb out this time, because I was just tired…. physically, mentally, emotionally exhausted. Very slowly over many, many months, I did climb my way out, I still have some very bad days, but I am doing much better now and this what I thought of as I created this image. I felt alone, in an empty room that was full of cracks, and I felt like I was cracking too like my heart and soul was just going to slip out of those cracks, but I fought, very hard and just like the walls in this room, I didn’t break!

For me creating this image meant so much more than just creating a piece of art, it meant that I was taking back my life and doing what I love again and after the past year I didn’t know if that was going to happen!! Creating my art helps me release so many emotions and dark feelings which help me more than I can say and I am grateful that I have that as an option.

Having said that I know that some people don’t have an outlet for their emotions, or feel like they have no one to talk too, for all of you I ask you to reach out to someone, whether it’s family or friends or even me, I know it’s scary to talk about but please talk to someone! You matter, you are loved, even if you think you aren’t you truly are!! If you want to talk to me, I am 100% here for you even if you just need someone to listen to you, reach out to me!! I have been there, I really do understand! ❤

Thank you for taking the time to read this,

Nikki xoxoxo

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/5/cracked Sat, 20 May 2017 18:28:18 GMT
I Love You Sessions http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/5/i-love-you-sessions I wanted to start with a little backstory. Coming up to 6 years ago on June 5th, 2011 I lost my Mom to brain cancer, she was my best friend, I could talk to her about anything and everything, we spoke every day on the phone, when she passed away, a piece of me went with her. 
6 years ago, I also created the fundraising mini sessions, where I donate 100% of the proceeds to the Brain Tumour Foundation of Canada. At the same time, I also created the R.M.K Session, which turned into the Renate Kebbert Memorial Session last year. I never really talked about it because I literally didn’t have time in my schedule. So much happened to our family last year that made me realize even more how precious life is and how important spending time with family is. This year I decided to do Mini Fundraisers again but for Children and in my Fine Art Style, and I am loving them but this will be my last year doing them. I feel like I need to do something more, make a difference in some way.

Since about November of 2016 I have felt like I lost myself, I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my work, I knew creating my art was on the top of that list and in April of this year it hit me hard that Fine Art Sessions are what I am meant to be doing, after I finished a session with a girl named Meri, I sat at my computer and cried, not because I was upset but because I knew in my heart it is what I am meant to do and I needed to start to listen to that, so that is what I am doing, Fine Art Sessions!!

Now back to the RMK sessions, yesterday I was watching something, it was emotional and my heart broke and again it hit me, I have some more time on my hands…..Finally, I have time to do something I have been trying to do for 6 years, something that I knew I needed to do, and I feel like I am the person to do it, I just know it in my heart! So the RMK Sessions are back, but I needed a better name, so I came up with this:

 

Now you are probably are wondering what it means or what does it have to do with my Mom. Well on the 29th of April, 2011 my Mom had a biopsy done on her tumour, actually two, that actually made it swell a great deal, so bad that my Mom became unresponsive, but like the strong woman she was, she woke up, but had lost the ability to speak at all, or to move the right side of her body. To not be able to hear her voice or hear what she wanted to say to me before she passed away was heartbreaking, but we taught her to sign “I love you” with her left hand, so that is how we ended our visits, we would sign “I love you” to each other, so that is what then hand means. And the little frog, well anyone that knew my Mom knows how much she LOVED frogs so I had to add that to it, plus I have the same little frog as a memorial tattoo for her on my shoulder!

I Love You Sessions is exactly what it sounds like, it is about pure love. These aren't so much sessions as documenting moments, the wonderful, the bad and the ugly. One of my biggest regrets is that I didn’t take photos at the hospital or even before my Mom went into the hospital, I don’t want others to have those same regrets. 

This is for families who have loved ones fighting cancer and any other diseases, I want to document every moment I can for them because I know how special and important photographs are. 

I will have to do some fundraising to help with my fees when it comes to travel etc, I hope to help fundraise for the families as well for any expenses they will incur in the future and for fuel and meals, I am working on coming up with some ideas for those.  

I would love for you to share this to get the word out there, I will also be approaching hospitals and nursing homes as well in the near future. 

I feel like my Mom would absolutely love this and that she is right here beside me as I write this to all of you!!

Thank you all so much for taking the time to read this very long blog.


Nikki xoxoxo

For more information on these session please go to  
I Love you Sessions

To make a donation to help me reach as many families as I can, with my travel expenses and to go towards fundraisers for them I have an account set up. You can either EMT me or send by Paypal.
EMT- nsmile@wightman.ca 
Paypal - nikkimulkern79@gmail.com

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2017/5/i-love-you-sessions Thu, 04 May 2017 16:32:06 GMT
Beautiful You http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/12/beautiful-you Beautiful You

 

As I was relaxing one evening this week, I was on a few closed groups I am a part of and like most days there were women on them talking bad about themselves, body shaming, saying that they feel like they are failure's as a Mom, saying they didn't feel beautiful. I realized I was just like them, I have felt that way about myself for years, and I think every Mom feels like they have failed at some point in their lives. 

 

As I was editing self-portraits for my SeneGence business I was looking at the portraits and I remembered that at that moment as I was taking them, I felt beautiful for the first time ever! I am 37 years old and finally could look at these images of myself and say, I am beautiful and I realized that I wanted other woman to feel that. I wanted them to see what I see in them, that they are beautiful on the inside as well as the outside! 


This isn't news to me or probably to most people, but women self-hate more than any other people and I think it needs to stop! All of this got me thinking that I should create a session just for women and teenage girls, something just for you, where you can dress up, do your hair and make-up, wear beautiful dresses and feel elegant, beautiful and confident and treat yourself for once  because guess what!?

You deserve it!!

That is how the Beautiful You Session came to mind!! 

I wanted the price to be as low as I could afford to make it so that you could treat yourself, your sister, your Mom, your daughter, best friend who ever you wanted to give this too!

Here is what is included:
- 1 hour of studio time
- Multiple wardrobe changes
- Up to 7 edited images available by digital download
- 1- 8x10 print of your choice
- Location is at my studio
$125

Now you may be wondering why 7 images, there are two reasons for that number, the first one is that I don't believe you need 20 plus images from this specific session. My goal with this session is to capture certain images, ones that you LOVE the way you feel and look in them, the most meaningful ones! The second reason is that 7 is my lucky number, sounds silly but for some reason, I felt like that was important,lol.

I will not be booking these until the New Year because at this time I need to be spending time with my family! BUT you can give these as gift certificates that will be valid for anytime in 2017. If this is something you want for yourself, get your hubby or boyfriend to message me and get a gift certificate!! 

Thank you so much for all the amazing comments on my images I have posted this week and about this session, I am truly excited about these!!

Have a Beautiful Day!! 

Nikki xoxoxo
 

P.S. As most of you know my Mom is a huge inspiration to me, she was an amazing woman, so I just decided that $25 from each of these sessions booked or Gift Certificates purchased will be donated to The Brain Tumour Foundation of Canada in my Mom's Memory

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

 

 

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/12/beautiful-you Wed, 07 Dec 2016 14:52:42 GMT
Christmas Mini Sessions 2016 http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/10/christmas-mini-sessions-2016 Christmas Mini Sessions

 

This year's Christmas Mini Sessions are fast approaching!!! I wanted these images to be beautiful and all about the families/children in them, not about all the stuff in the background. I also wanted one background to be geared towards children and the other one more towards family photos, which you could hang up all year round if you wanted too!!

Here are the Dates/Times as well as more information on what is included for this year's sessions! Please email me at nsmile@wightman.ca or message me on facebook to book your spot!!


Christmas Mini's!!!
30-minute sessions
10 high-resolution images available by digital download  (in colour 
and black and white )
Two custom backgrounds
$100 
$25 retainer to hold your date and time, the remaining balance is due the day of the session.
Emt's can be sent to nsmile@wightman.ca

Saturday, Nov 5th, 2016 
10 am - 
10:45 am -
11:30 am -
1 pm -
1:45 pm - Candace F.
2:30 pm - Julia Z
3:15 pm - Veronica

Sunday, Nov 6th, 2016
10 am - Tammy S.
10:45 am - Teresa S.
11:30 am - Erna L.
1 pm - Lisa P. 
1:45 pm - 
2:30 pm - 
3:15 pm - Meghan C

 

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/10/christmas-mini-sessions-2016 Tue, 18 Oct 2016 15:51:09 GMT
HUGE Announcement!! http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/8/huge-announcement Last year I made the decision to no longer offer the family sessions that I have been offering for years, as I go through and photograph amazing families this year, I have been told how sad they are that I am no longer offering them, and just how much those sessions mean to them.
Others have sent me the most beautiful messages once they have seen all their images, about just how important they are to their family, and how they feel when they are looking at them!


I always knew in the back of my mind that they were important, I have said so myself many times, but I don't think I truly understood the impact they have on all of you and how important they really are to everyone. 
This got me thinking, I have always said that having pictures of your loved ones is extremely important, especially after you lose a loved one! Besides my memories of my Mom, the only thing I have are pictures of her and I cherish those every day!! I couldn't even imagine not having them to look at when I needed to see her face! 


Because of all my amazing clients, all of you reading this, I have decided that starting next year ( because this year I am completely booked up ) I will once again be offering family sessions!! I want to say a HUGE Thank You to all of you for reminding me that what I do is so important, sometimes even I forget just how important!! If it wasn't for you all telling me your stories this may not be happening!!


I will still be offering and doing my Fine Art Sessions, but my regular family sessions will be on that list as well!


You are all truly amazing and supportive and I can't wait to photograph you and your beautiful families for years to come!!

Nikki xoxo

 

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/8/huge-announcement Tue, 09 Aug 2016 15:19:15 GMT
Important Changes and Updates http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/5/important-changes-and-updates

Hi, everyone!!

I wanted to write this blog to tell everyone what is going on and keep you all updated on everything. 


I have received many emails about doing sessions this year, both fundraising ones as well as regular ones, which is so amazing! I figured I should write what exactly has changed with my business, what sessions I do offer which ones I don't offer anymore and the changes that will happen with the fundraising mini sessions starting next year.


Over the past 7 + years I have had the opportunity to photograph so many amazing families, newborns, and moments and I am truly grateful for every single one of them! Last year I made the decision to no longer photograph newborns and limit my family sessions I did per year. As the year went on and this one started I realized a few things and knew I needed to make more changes. So I no longer offer newborns or family sessions ( in the style that I have done for the past 7 + years ) 


Now for what I do offer in sessions, you can see all the details on my website here: http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/prices---packages, but here is a quick run down. I offer Fine Art Session, Children's Portraits, Portraits (for adults or older children ), Creative Session and Dance Fine Art Sessions ( all ages ).


You may be wondering why all the changes, it comes down to quite a few reasons, one was my schedule, in the past 7 years I didn't have a weekend off all summer, not one single weekend to relax and more importantly enjoy spending time with my boys and husband and that is the # 1 reason I have made these changes, for them....I missed so much of them growing up and I will no longer miss any of that. Another reason is that I have to follow my heart and what I love to do, and that is creating art and photographing in this fine art style.
 I always say you need to love the life you live and live the life you love and I haven't been doing that for a few years and I feel now is the time to change all that. I wanted to add that none of these were easy decisions they took me years to make and realize that it was the right thing for me and my family <3


On to the Fundraising Mini Sessions, it has been an amazing 5 years doing these fundraisers, I have donated over $6,000 to The Brain Tumour Foundation of Canada in my Mom's memory and that would have never happened without the amazing people that have come out every year and supported this amazing cause! I always get told it's amazing that I do this, but I mean it when I say it would have never happened without all of you and for that I will be forever grateful! <3


This is probably the hardest decision I have had to make....ever.....but this will be my last year doing these fundraising mini sessions.  I am not sure what I will do next year, I may have a sale or auction of my sessions I offer now or some of my work in print ( landscapes and fine art )both of which I would donate the proceeds to the Brain Tumour Foundation of Canada in my Mom's name. I haven't figured that part out yet, but I will keep you all posted on that as I figure things out. In the meantime, I really can't wait for the ones I have scheduled for this year!!


When my Mom passed away one of the first things I created, even before the fundraising mini sessions, was the R.M.K Session ( that was what I used to call it ) which is something so very near and dear to my heart, but because of my workload, I was unable to keep up with it. This was a big factor for me no longer offering the fundraising mini sessions, I wanted to bring it back, and I decided to do just that, it's called the Renate Kebbert Memorial Session.  Here is a little bit about what these memorial sessions are all about. When my Mom was sick, I only took a few photographs and they were of her and my boys, none of me and her and none at the hospital where I was savoring every moment I had with her, and that is one of my Biggest Regrets, that I didn't just photograph her, the details of her face, her hands, my family members with her, the good the bad and the ugly of it all!! It might sound strange to you, but I would give anything to have all those moments and memories that I could look at whenever I wanted to! So that made me realize that I need to offer this again to those that are going through the same things that my Mom went through, and that I went through. 


In my Mom's memory I am offering very special sessions for those that have a loved one with a critical/terminal illness, it can be done at home, at the hospital in palliative care, where ever the family likes, this is absolutely free to the family,  I just  really want to give them memories to hold on too for so many years to come. In order for me to have time to capture all these important memories for families, I needed to make more changes so that I could have that time. You can read all the details and the back story here: http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/renate-kebbert-memorial-session


I wanted to say a HUGE THANK YOU to every single person that has supported me these past 7+ years, it has been absolutely amazing!! And I hope you remember I am not going anywhere, I am just changing what I offer and what I do. I hope to still capture your beautiful children just in a different style. Make sure to keep a look out on my business page for any updates or special sessions I may offer.


If you have any questions at all, please don't hesitate to email me or PM on facebook,


Nikki xoxo

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/5/important-changes-and-updates Mon, 16 May 2016 19:30:40 GMT
Shut Up http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/3/shut-up Shut Up


I know that the title of this one sounds harsh, but sometimes you just have to do it, lol


I have been living with depression for 10 years now, with that came major anxiety and panic disorder, if you have had any of these you know how draining they can be, and you probably have to deal with people that don't understand it at all, or just don't think you can have it. 


I have had many people through this time say somethings to me that affected me a lot. I have been told " that you have nothing to be sad about", " Get over it", "Try smiling that will make it go away", " You must be weak if you have depression" That is just some of the things that have been said to me. I will be honest most of these people aren't in my life anymore, as I don't need that kind of negativity around me. I know there are some that just don't understand any of this and that is fine, I am ok with that, it's the ones that are rude or just plain mean with what they say that I tend to not want to be around anymore. When you live with depression, anxiety or have panic attacks, you struggle every day to try and stay as positive as you can, try not to worry about everything and just breathe.


The other thing that I struggle with is sleep, I really don't sleep well. I have nightmares most nights, usually of my Mom passing away over and over again. But also I have a terrible time shutting off my mind, I will think constantly about work, bills, the kids, Rye, something that I need to do the next day or the next week, it really doesn't stop.


With this image I wanted to show what I feel like doing when I am surround by negativity, I really want them to shut up! Even though they may feel like they are helping, generally they aren't, depression and anxiety is not something you can just get over, it's something that you have to work at, and sometimes you will have it the rest of your life, that doesn't mean you are sad all the time, it just means that you will have moments of deep emotions that you have to push through, and that makes you a strong person, not a weak person <3


I really hope you are enjoying all these images so far =)


Nikki xoxo

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/3/shut-up Fri, 11 Mar 2016 14:04:39 GMT
Breathe http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/3/breathe Breathe

 

A couple of weeks ago my youngest brought a note home from the principal, he had been acting out a lot recently and she wanted me to come into the school, now normally this would have been an "Oh great moment" and I would talk to Bryce and then meet with the principal and that would be it, but not a couple of weeks ago. I read that note and broke down, it was the final straw that just broke me completely. I had a really bad panic attack, one of the worst ones I have had in years. I couldn't breathe, I was shaking, crying uncontrollably and just thought I have failed at everything, raising my kids, being a wife, life in general......


I texted my amazing friend Shannon, I knew out of everyone she would understand, and she did. She took the time to help me get through this attack, and the first thing she said to me is you need to breathe, just breathe!! Sounds simple right?! Well it isn't, lol. If you have ever had a panic attack, you will know how hard it is to just take a breath. I eventually was able to calm down, but I don't know if I would have been able to without her help. My close friends know that I kind of go things alone over here, well besides my hubby, I am so grateful to have such amazing friends that are more like family to me, that are there for me 100% and I like to think I am there for them too, I really hope I am <3


So back to this Breathe image, I knew I wanted to shoot this infront  of my large doors in the studio, I wanted it to be back lit, but that was about it. I started editing and I had no clue what to do with the image, I knew what I wanted it to show, but wasn't sure how I would get that done. About 2 hours into the image, it came to me, how I was going to edit it. 


It is quite different than my other images, as it's lighter in look. I wanted to be surrounded by it, I wanted to be curled up, tense, stressed....panicked. But I wanted there to be a light above me, my light essentially, my hope and it is shining down. I wanted to show that even when you are in a bad place, your light, your hope is always there with you. 

 

Nikki xoxo

 

 

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/3/breathe Mon, 07 Mar 2016 14:45:00 GMT
Dark Place http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/3/dark-place Dark Place

 

The 2nd image in my series is called Dark Place, it's pretty self-explanatory but here is a little bit about this image.
Dark Place is where I disappear too when I am having a hard time when things are really bad and I just can't or don't want to deal with anything. I think anyone that has depression, goes to a dark place when it's particularly bad. 
This is when I want to curl up and shut everyone else in my life out, which I know sounds really horrible, but it is exactly how I feel. Sometimes I am not in this place long, but some times I am in it for weeks. I will pull away from my family and friends. From creating the work I love, I have no motivation to do anything at these times.


I am so grateful that I have an amazing support system, my husband understands these moments I have and he lets me have them if I need too. My boys, even though they don't really understand depression, they do understand why I need some time by myself sometimes and they give me that time, which is more than I could ever ask for. My friends, oh my friends have pulled me out of this dark place so many times, there are times where I just don't know how I would have gotten through it without my husband, kids, and friends <3


When it came to creating this image, I wanted to look like I was in a dark room, surrounded by that darkness like it was enveloping me, but I also wanted there to be light, the hope that I will get out of this place. It usually seems out of reach, but it is always there! This is what I wanted to show in this image!

Nikki xoxo

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/3/dark-place Sat, 05 Mar 2016 13:04:56 GMT
Tears!! http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/3/tears Tears

 

The past few months have been very difficult, so many bad things happening and I was so incredibly overwhelmed, stressed, anxious and exhausted! Many of you know that I suffer from depression, it has been a struggle for over 10 years now, most of the time I can bounce back pretty quickly, but not this time.....This time, it was big, it was dark and it was ugly. 


I just wanted to curl up into a ball, cry and hide away until I felt better, but I knew I couldn't do that. I have two amazing kids that need me and I have a wonderful husband that needs me, so for them I got up every day and did what I could do to just function, not for me but for them!
Last week it got bad, I mean really really bad, and I Thank God for having amazing friends that helped me through all of it and for giving me the strength to pull myself up again.


On Wed, I was sitting and listening to music, which always inspires me and thought about the past few months, and I decided that I needed to create a series on depression and my struggles throughout it. 


You may wonder why?! Why created images that will be sad and painful?! Well, for me!! I know that it will help me to crawl out of this deep hole I am in. I also create my best work when it something personal to me, something I may be going through or had been through in the past. And also, I think that depression needs to be talked about more, it isn't something you should be ashamed of, you are not alone!! And even though some days you just want to give up, you don't because you've got this, you are strong enough to get through this, it may not seem like it but you are!! <3


So with that being said, here is image # 1 simply called "Tears"


One of the biggest struggles I have is just being sad, heartbroken in emotional pain and for me, there are so many tears, some days I feel as though my heart is literally breaking as memories of my Mom float into my head, or if I think about what ifs. But after I cry, I feel in a way cleansed if that makes sense?! Like I just washed out some of those painful memories.....


This was not easy to take, I had to go to go back to when my Mom was in the hospital, holding her hand and listening to every laboured breath she took, but I also wanted this to be real, I wanted the pain on my face to show as I went back to that, I wanted real tears running down my face, I wanted pure raw emotion. 


I look forward to sharing more from my series, and from my personal experience with depression and hopefully how this series is helping me heal and maybe it will help someone out there as well!


Nikki xoxo 

 

 

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/3/tears Thu, 03 Mar 2016 12:35:52 GMT
More Changes....... http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/2/more-changes More Changes.......

 

More Changes......


I am constantly trying to make things work better for my clients, and with all the changes with my sessions this year, it meant I had to completely re-do my website, prices and packages.


I have been debating whether I should just offer prints ( which is what I had since the beginning of the year ) or if I should offer images files by download because I know that my clients love that. Well after a lot of thought, I figured why not offer both. So now you get to choose which you would like prints OR files!! 


I have updated the packages, what is included and prices to reflect this very important change. 


I also have written at the bottom of the page about my prints and canvases and what makes them different from say, Wal-mart prints or canvas, there are so many differences, quality being the biggest one!


You will also notice that you can now use a creative session as a family session, BUT they are not your traditional family session with posing and smiling etc, please read the description on my website for more details.


Another important thing I wanted to write was the prices, you may wonder why the children's session or the Fine art session ( for adults/couples ) are the prices they are, I put an incredible amount of work in every single image I give you, which is an average of 1-3 hours editing per image on a child's photo ( depending on if it was taken in studio or on location ) and up to 4 hours on the adult ones. My work definitely doesn't stop once I click that shutter, it never did, but with my style now I spend a great deal of time making each image absolutely perfect. Even with the creative sessions, I want those to be pieces of art for your family to treasure.

To see all the changes to my prices/packages click on investment at the top of the page =)


Ok, I hope that all makes sense, lol. I am so happy to be offering these fine art sessions they make me so happy to do and create! I am booking now for spring/summer so if there is a session you are interested in me, shoot me an email at nsmile@wightman.ca or a message on Facebook!!

Don't forget I am offering a Mother's Day Special, check out my facebook page for details!! It is a great saving!!


Enjoy your Sunday!


Nikki xoxoxo

 

And just because this blog is all about changing, throw back to my changing image from last year!

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nsmile@wightman.ca (In Focus Photography By: Nicole) http://www.infocusphotographybynicole.com/blog/2016/2/more-changes Sun, 21 Feb 2016 18:51:16 GMT